The country of Yerbouti is shaped roughly like a short, fat clown standing on his head, and tipping to the right a bit. The country still retains roughly the same borders assigned to the French at the Berlin Conference in 1884 when the map of Africa was divided between the Europeans powers. Split up with no consideration given to the cultural topography of the area, the country encompasses Arabs, dozens of native tribes, and (nowadays, at least) westernized Africans. Languages spoken include Arabic, French, English and twenty or so native dialects. Fortunately, though the country suffers from a particularly low literacy rate, most of its residents speak at least three languages so there is rarely a language barrier to hinder what trade there is.
Yerbouti is bordered by five countries. The most important is the country to the north ruled by that crazy colonel, H'wakhy K'dhaffy. Although the colonel has his hands full at the moment, he is always a threat to his neighbors and by-products of the problems there are always likely to spill over into nearby lands. To its west, Yerbouti adjoins Ipekakya, which is economically, politically and socially stable and contains, for a change, no major (or minor) threats to Yerbouti. Ipekakya tries to be a good neighbor to its less fortunate friend, and it was Ipekakya that allowed the UN to stage relief convoys in its territory following the civil war. To the southwest is another of its most important neighbors, the Republique du Moz, which, though fairly stable economically, harbors certain elements that no country wants to see invade its borders. The Black Water River and the swamps which share the same name separate the Republique du Moz from Yerbouti, but trouble always seems to find its way across this forbidding waterway. The exact border through the waterway between these two countries is a continuing source of contention. To the southeast we find Goannaland. Goannaland has had a troubled history and finds itself in the midst of rebellion, revolution or civil war every 10 years or so on average. Bamabar, Yerbouti's neighbor to the east, is likewise a poor country, poorer even that Yerbouti. Politically, economically and socially it is in complete chaos most of the time and so busy dealing with its own problems that it is of little consequence (at the moment at least) to Yerbouti, except for the occasional groups of refugees that find their way to Yerbouti's borders. Most of the potential refugees came to realize during the civil war that Yerbouti was worse off than their own country in some ways and avoided it like the plague it was. Now that the civil war has ended and prosperity, such as it is, has returned, so will the refugees, we are sure.
Yerbouti can be divided into three distinct bands. The northern third lies in the Sahara (which, by the way, is Arabic for 'desert' so it's redundant to call it the Sahara Desert - that would be like calling it the 'Desert Desert'). In this region, farming and herding is minimal, and found only in the occasional oasis where natural springs rise to the surface and provide life sustaining water for the desert dwellers. This area does harbor approximately 1/4 of the country's population, mostly made up of Muslim Arabs. Below that, the middle third is grassland dotted with occasional stands of trees. Here there is a good bit of farming and ranching, supporting about 3/8 of the population. In this region, most of the inhabitants still live in their traditional tribes and follow their ancient animist ways, though some Christians and Muslims live among them. The southern third of the country is forested and likewise contains about 3/8 of the population, mostly Christians, some live in tribal villages while others have adopted the modern life of the the city and regional centers. There is a fair amount of agriculture and ranching in this region as well. As can be seen, these geographic regions also serve to roughly define the cultural regions of the country.
The east central portion of the country is located in high plateau, which slopes gradually down in all directions forming, at its lowest point, the Black Water Valley. A few tributaries of varying sizes feed the Black Water River from Yerbouti's side, but only one extends as far as the grasslands, and none to the desert north. There are no mountains to speak of, but rolling hills do serve to break up the monotony of the landscape, and in the north central part of the country there is an odd topography created eons ago when rushing water cut meandering channels into the landform which remain to this day, forming a sort of rocky badlands region.
Wacca Jawacca, the capital of Yerbouti, is located between the grassland and forested regions in the western half of the country on the Ray'nbo River, a tributary of the Black Water River. Wacca Jawacca is the only locale that could be considered a modern city by any stretch of the imagination. It created untold excitement in the country when the first - well, only - stoplight was installed, and sightseers from the surrounding villages still stop to gawk at the flashing light when travelling to the big market in the city square. There is a small handful of towns that have risen to the level of regional centers where government services can be obtained, but these in no way rival Wacca Jawacca. In essence, aside from the capital virtually all population centers in Yerbouti could be considered little more than villages by western standards, and even Wacca Jawacca is little more than a town to most westerners.
As noted elsewhere, the economy is subsistence agriculture with a small surplus for trade. Cattle and goats are herded for their meat, hides and milk. Herds tend to the small size. Honey bees are kept in most villages. An abundance of vegetables are farmed in most villages as well. Yerbouti has no cash crops, though there is some small scale farming of cotton strictly for local use. What industry there is is cottage industry. The official currency is the pokah t'ship, currently worth about 5/8 of an American cent in international trading, and the average household in Yerbouti earns about 250 t'ships per year. The surplus of veggies and other small crops are generally sold to neighboring countries to earn the country its limited budget, most of which goes to the military and to paying government employees. Despite the small population - or perhaps because of it - a significant percentage of the population works for the government in some capacity.
We hope that this special edition of 'What's Happening in Yerbouti?' has given our readers some more insight into our beautiful, pristine homeland. We will cover Yerbouti's history and mixed culture in future special editions. We love Yerbouti and hope you will too when you get to know us. Coming at you from Wacca Jawacca.
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