President Shakerattl'n'roll at the grand opening of Kathy
Lee's sweatshop here in Wacca Jawacca. Standing with
him are General Charles Robert Aygotcha in full
blingety-bling-bling-bling and none other than the
smoking hot, bodacious Kathy Lee Herself (and
yes, we capitalized that on purpose).
The president declared that this was a "great day for Yerbouti and for Yerboutians everywhere" because it demonstrated the country's "entry onto the world economic stage". While the sweatshop will actually raise the average income of Yerbouti substantially, it will still be among the lowest GNPs in the world, even below Albania. "Yerboutians will now have the mod-est, hip-est clothing to wear - just like the western countries," he continued. Apparently, he did not know that the clothes are for sale in America only. "This man is an idiot," General Aygotcha was heard to quip, shaking his head.
The workers have already been selected and began learning to sew today on the ultra modern North Korean sewing machines purchased at a discount for the sweatshop. In a brief tour of the sweatshop this morning, our reporters got to see the workers in action. Kathy Lee is producing some strange things for sale in America. Perhaps they are for display at the Paris fashion show.
In other news, things appear to be heating up in the north with sporadic violence being reported. When we find out why, we'll tell you.
This has been another stellar day for 'What's Happening in Yerbouti?'. Y'all come back now, hear?